Recently someone posted this question in the introvert subreddit on reddit: "How to deal with half wanting new friends and half wanting to be a hermit?"

I hear and read questions like this all the time from introverts and introverted HSPs. We cherish being alone, and then sometimes wonder if we can get along without worrying about having relationships. After all, relationships are time consuming, difficult, and can be painful.

But then we often realize that we cannot exist alone. It might seem easier to avoid relationships, but it is bad for our mental and physical health. Humans were built to need and thrive on connection with others.

A Vice.com interview with Amy Banks, PhD, titled, "An Expert Explains Why You Feel So Lonely All the Time" really piqued my interest in this topic. I loved Dr. Banks' scientific explanation of why having quality relationships is so important.

Dr. Banks was an instructor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and is now the Director of Advanced Training at Jean Baker Miller Training Institute at the Wellesley Centers for Women. Her newest book is called Wired to Connect: The Surprising Link Between Brain Science and Strong, Healthy Relationships.

On this episode, we talk about:

• The health impact of loneliness and disconnection
• Why American society values the "do-it-alone" mindset so strongly
• The dopamine reward system and relationships
• Online bullying
• How a boss or manager can use good relationships to improve the workplace
• Connections with animals
• And....communism?!? (Note: communism is discussed simply for the concept of community vs. individualism. We are not saying we want to live in a communist society!)

Amy recommends that those looking to improve their relationships first take her free Relational Assessment. You can get in touch with Amy on Twitter, Facebook, and check out her column on Psychology Today: Wired to Love Other books recommended by Dr. Banks in this episode:

• Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community by Robert Putnam
• Love and Survival: 8 Pathways to Intimacy and Health by Dean Ornish

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If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works. A special thank you to Gloria, the newest supporter!

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

Today's guest, Al Motter, is one of the hosts of the excellent Introvert Extrovert podcast. He's the "Introvert" out of the two hosts, but he doesn't have the trait of high sensitivity.

In this episode, Al talks about how he sometimes wishes he was more sensitive, and how a recent bout of medication gave him a few weeks of heightened sensitivity--resulting in some fascinating insights into our world. H

is perspective, as an outsider to the HSP world, can help HSPs see the larger picture: there ARE a lot of great things about being able to feel deeply!

He also talks about tutoring crying kids, why physically larger males are "allowed" to cry, and loving Benihana restaurant (which I hate).

Want to support the podcast? If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works. A special thank you to Rebecca Hilder, the newest supporter!

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

Did you know that highly sensitive people and narcissists tend to be attracted to each other?

I've welcomed Nikki Eisenhauer onto the show today to discuss what a narcissist is and why HSPs can be drawn to people with narcissistic personality disorder.

I think it's important for HSPs to be aware of this topic so they can identify and deal with harmful relationships.

Nikki is an engaging guest and does a great job of explaining this topic in a digestible way. She is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), chemical dependency counselor (LCDC), yoga and meditation teacher, and possible budding comedian. In this episode, we talk about:

What is a narcissist vs. sociopath personality, The difference between anxiety and intuition, What it's like to be an HSP and a therapist, What most therapists don't know about HSPs, Why improv might be good for HSPs, and more!

Nikki specializes in trauma, grief and loss, addiction, and has come to understand what wounds, drives, and heals Highly Sensitive People. Her most recent passion project is Wise Owl Within, where she offers Sensitive and Healers support, evolution, and the life they desire. Get in touch with her on Facebook and Twitter!

Want to support the podcast? If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works. http://www.patreon.com/hsp

Sign up for my twice-monthly newsletter to stay up-to-date on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and HSP news.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

I'm thrilled to have on the podcast Oliver Burkeman, author of The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking.

Oliver is a writer for The Guardian. In his column titled, "This column will change your life", he explores ideas around social psychology, self-help culture, productivity, and the science of happiness.

The Antidote was one of those books that came at the right time in my life. I was struggling with insomnia, brought on by anxiety....brought on by feeling like I wasn't achieving enough every day. This book helped me feel a lot more at peace about the "glass half empty" personality I've always had. It explains powerful concepts from Buddhism, Stoicism, Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts (and more) in his entertaining, accessible, and lovely writing style.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why traditional "positive thinking" doesn't work,
• The downside of goal-setting,
• Embracing uncertainty,
• Meditation,
• Whether thinking too much makes you depressed,
• The answers he's still looking for,
• and more!

You can find Oliver on his website and Twitter (let him know you liked this interview!) And of course, you should buy his wonderful book.

Want to support the podcast? If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works.

Sign up for my twice-monthly newsletter to stay up-to-date on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and HSP news.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Two acquaintances in the same week made similar comments to me out of nowhere: that they felt behind, like they weren't getting enough done in their work and businesses. It made me sad to hear that they were struggling and not feeling good about themselves.

I can totally relate to the feeling of underachievement. I felt inspired to try to help those of us who can never live up to our own expectations. In this episode, I talk about:

• How we compare ourselves to others on social media, even though we know it's not reality.
• How happiness can only be now--not the future.
• Never being content; always wanting "the other thing".
• How we should stop saying "I should...."
• ....And stop beating ourselves up.

Mentioned in this episode: Join The Haven, a community for HSPs. Registration is only available until April 28! It's only $1 for the first month and you can cancel anytime. Go to: highlysensitiveperson.net/haven

Want to support the podcast? If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

A popular misconception about Highly Sensitive people--to those who aren’t very familiar with the trait--is that HSPs are always emotionally fragile and not mentally strong.

But this isn't true. You CAN be mentally strong and an HSP--it's all about your coping skills. That’s why I’m excited to share with you Episode 61's guest, Amy Morin, who is an expert on mental strength. Amy is a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, professor, a TED talk speaker, and published author. In 2013, her post 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, went viral, and ended up being published into a bestselling book and translated into 20 languages. Her post was the most read article of all time on Forbes.com.

I was moved by her story and the challenges she’s dealt with in her life, and how she’s found a way to thrive and become an authority on helping others learn how to better cope. In this episode, Amy talks about:

• The most common thing mentally strong people don't do
• How to build mental strength
• Why seeing a therapist can help, even if you go just once
• What therapists think about Highly Sensitive People
• How to stop dwelling on the past
• How to deal with anticipatory grief

Learn more about Amy Morin:

• Her book: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success
• Check out Amy's ecourse: Mental Strength: Mastering The 3 Core Factors
• Website: amymorin.com
• Twitter: @AmyMorinLCSW

Want to support the podcast?
If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works.

Sign up for my twice-monthly newsletter to stay up-to-date on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and HSP news.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

I realized recently that I haven't done an episode (in detail) about the benefits of high sensitivity.

HSPs are meant to be here. We have a role to play in this world.

I plan to do a few episodes about this topic--since there is so much to cover--but this specific show is about the people who are celebrated for their sensitivity. That's right--those who are successful and respected due in part to their sensitive nature and what they bring to the world.

Want to support the podcast? Become a Patron! 

If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works.

Sign up for my twice-monthly newsletter to stay up-to-date on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and HSP news.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

I've heard the word "empath" a lot, but didn't truly understand what it meant. I thought it maybe simply referred to people who experienced a lot of empathy....? But that didn't seem right. When searching for a simple explanation about empaths, I came up empty, until I found this great article on Caroline's website, The Happy Sensitive. It was then I knew that I just had to get Caroline on the podcast to help explain empaths!

In this episode, we discuss:

• What is and isn't an empath
• The struggles and benefits of being an empath
• The difference between an empath, trained empath, and clair-sentient
• Energy and spiritual levels versus practical, psychological level

Want to support the podcast?

If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works.

Sign up for my twice-monthly newsletter to stay up-to-date on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and HSP news.

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

Have you ever gotten into an argument about politics with a family member or co-worker and you got really angry and fired up? Have you ever gotten into a fight online with a complete idiot? Then, did you later find yourself turning over the events in your head, getting angry all over again? Then you felt a little sheepish about it? This episode is about just that--when we HSPs get passionate and fired up about our opinions, we sometimes forget that we have a CHOICE about whether or not to get upset. Here are some tips on how to deal with those people who really know how to push your buttons.

Thank you to Sian Broughton for supporting this podcast on Patreon!! 

If you enjoy my podcast and blog, if you find it helpful, uplifting, or entertaining, that's awesome! Would you consider giving just $1 per episode? Check out my Patreon page to see how it works. You can get special rewards, too!

Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

One of the reasons being a Highly Sensitive Person is tough because a lot of people don't believe that HSP is a legitimate thing.

This episode 39 is about dealing with those haters. It's a little heavy on the sarcasm and ranty-ness, so fair warning.

My new book is out on Amazon: A Highly Sensitive Person's Life: stories & tips for those who experience the world intensely.

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Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 

Are you ever sorry about being sorry? Have you apologized to inanimate objects? Because HSPs are observant to social cues and other people’s feelings, we tend to be very polite. And not only do HSPs have good manners, we notice when other people’s don’t.

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Podcast music attribution: By the Coast (2004) (Antony Raijekov) / CC BY-NC 2.5

In today's episode, I talk about the most interesting parts of this great interview of Dr. Elaine Aron on Reset.me. It's about genetic studies and stuff. Ok, ok, that doesn't sound very exciting, does it? Take #2. In today's episode, I talk about why high sensitivity hasn't been bred out of humans (in an evolutionary sense) and that HSPs might be more likely to be thrive (or, conversely, suffer) than non-HSPs, depending on their upbringing. SCIENCE! If you like the podcast, please leave a positive review on iTunes! Sign up for the weekly newsletter to be notified of the latest blog posts, podcast episodes, and HSP news.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

• Please check out the source for the summarized content of this episode: this interview on Reset.me of Dr. Elaine Aron by Lynn Parramore

Podcast music attribution: By the Coast (2004) (Antony Raijekov) / CC BY-NC 2.5